challange

i have been issued a challege today. to find my cousin and get in contact with her. right i have loads and loads of cousins but all of them are important and this one has disapeared. she was tacken into foster care when she was a little girl and has cut off all communication with our family since. now i think this is because she has quite negative memories of her time going into foster care and its too hard to be in contact with some of us.

but my family thin that if anyone is going to get her to talk to them its me. i am not so sure. but we shall see it would be good to know how she was doing so we shall see.

success in the classroom

well at least i think it was a success.

lead a revision disscussion class on creationisum today which went really well although had a few inital hiches like the projector not being able to conncet up to my computer so i could not use the powerpoint or video clips that i had prepared the young people had enough questions to keep us going for a while.

a near perfect weekend

Gordon and i have just spent an really lovley few days together. we oringonly where going to go up to avimuir and spend a few nights in a b and b but that did not work out but i actualy think what we did do was much better anyway.

Gordon planned a hole host of activertiese and did not tell me what they where until we were there. which was really good fun for me i hope it was for him.

first we went to dundee and the theater and saw a really great play called the wall about a load of glawigan kids on their summer holls it was soooooo funny i would highly recomend it.

then the next day we spent the day in st andrews we tryed to fly kites although it was not windy enough so much hilarity insued. then we went to the aquirum and looked at the fish which was supprisingly good. we also went to the castle it was free that day which was really good. they have a mine and countermine where a sieghing army tryed to under mine the castle to breack in which we went down. was quite freacked out by the exsperance really it was very small and damp down their very closterphibic but also very cool.
we went to the cathedral as well and up to the top of the tower thing very good.
finaly we eat fish and chips looking out over the ocen which was lovley.

then we came back to the flat and watched ratitue also really good fun.

today we went into edingbugh and to the gallery to see the warder choice exerbision which was really good and sat in the park.

we also found the theater that we are going to tomorrow night to see dads play.

i am so sorry that it has had to end soooo soon but then the good things can't last forever i guess.

back from the north

been to see my lovley Erica the last few days which was so fabby.

talked for ages about everything went out for lunch to a shortbread factory yesterday which was very nice (didn't have any shortbread) and played Phas10 with her friends in ellel and their lovley baby i lost so but it was a good game.

then went for a nice long walk this morning before i had to leave to go home.

the drive there and back was amazing!!!! so beautiful you could honistly cry. driving through the snow on the moutains and so on.

ups and downs

had a really nice day yesterday church was good and went out with the YP to Pizza Hut made cards. trying to sell some on ebay not going amazingly well but then i have never been amazing at selling things. persentational skills not been my strong point. but i think i am getting better.

had a bit of a stress this morning but its okay now and am sitting watching life on mars and with so chocolate buttions and my lap top. which is good gonna clean later and give this place a good going over so that when the new term start i will get head start with keeping it clean.

can't wait for the end of the week though going to see Erica and going away with Gordon :)

fuzzy brain syndorm

okay i am just back from a day conferance on house churches and trying to start a new exspersion of church within our comunites in scotland. feeling a little over whelmed but i am sure my brain will put off the new info into it place sometime soon.

it was a very good forum though enjoyed the day.


Gordon is back from camp yay but does not look like we are going to see that much of each other until the weekend sigh never mind.

btw Conratuations Hannah and Dyl on your Engagments :-) (-:

My First Day At School

Simon's Cat 'Let Me In!'

Simon's Cat 'Cat Man Do'

feeling a bit better

okay so i am being helped towards the middle of the tree there are good points to my linemanagment and but its better than having nothing there at all.

i don't know though still feeling discoriged and quite low

su was okay but i looked at the wrong verce so was alittle disjointed.

i hope Youth House Group goes well tonight it has the potental to be a good night be genraly it has the potental all the time.

the worst bit is over

superhero is done
vis a vis is done
easter assbly is done

its almost plain sailing until easter is over and thats a really good thing

gordon and i went to see south pacific last night which was great we had such a lovley night was so upset when it came to an end. but then you can't live in a time bubble however much you would like to.

now the wind is blowing

humph so inregards to me earler post that i was stuck at the end of a branch that was beinging to creack.

well this week the wind pickted up so am feeling even more insecure than i was then.

some quite significant stuff kicked off at the school which was one of the envirmoents that i was feeling fairly confident about os it has hit me quite hard.

feeling alittle like i have done something really badly or really wronge at work in jenral which i am sure is not the case.

i have been alittle frustraited and stressed well okay alot frustraited and stressed but which else was there for me to feel. was strating to feel truley abbandond by my managment. i am a person who needs lots of support and help in lots of things and when i don't get that then i mess up.

but now it feels alittle like something has gone wrong so my managment are jumping feet first in an attempt to fix it and they might not really look what they are about to land on. its great they want to help me with these problems but i really do not want them to make these problems into bigger deals than they are already. i would also like to know that they can see that i have done good work for them for the last 7 months and it is not all just this one thing that has gone wrong now. and the thing that coursed it to be an issue in the first place (my communication skills) is not something that is unfixable.

i am hurt enough from the Y problems I hope they can see that and that I need TLC to be the best i can be.

Christian Pat and his Charismatic Cat

this is sooooo funny

the camera that looks through clouths

hehehehe

out on a limb thats starting to creck

feeling very alown at the moment and slightly bereft. if i was doing the blooby tree that we used to use a load in college. i would be far away from everyone else and on a thine branch.

there you go i have done quite a lot to put myself in this possition. the problem is that its happening in every asspect of my life and right now i don't feel like there is anyone i really can talk to about it.

which again is my own fault.

i mean i can talk to different people about different asspects of my life which i guess i should be happy with but what i would really like is to have someone that i could offload it all to and to know that that person would help me find solutions without trying to sort them out for me. i mean i don't need resuce i need support.

school let down

headed into the school this morning but the assembaly that i was supposed to be doing was canceled. this is not a problem really but its slightly frustraiting. i did ask the receptionist if it was on the other day knowing that other peoples assembalies had been cancelled but as far as she new it was on. i wish they would let all their staff know when things have changed but i guess thats really differcult in big schools.

buddies was gerat yesterday and tuesday, su was okay.

just rescued cheery from the inside of the couch which was silly of her to get into there.

emotional moment

get so frustraited with my self sometimes. why is it that when i am tired angry frustraited or anything all i can seem to do it burst into tears. i hate it partly because it is embarrising makes everyone worry get stressed around me. and when i am already tired it makes me even more tired.
basicly spent the whole church service this morning weeping away but hey thats me i guess i have to learn to live with it.

enage tonight which should be good have only limited input this month because was away in Albania when the meeting happend.

not complaining though!

the real start of easter maddness

been a chaplancy meeting today planning the easster assemblies. then we have super hero and vis a vis comeing to the church. tbh i can't wait till its all done and dusted. not saying it wont be fun it will its just going to be incredably hard work for the next few weeks.

not to worry though going to take a weeks holiday afterwoulds to recover and Gordon and i might head up north for a long weekend away in some hostel or other which would be nice.

back

Albainia was brill

could have stayed for another week at least.

although i was very tired when i can home

did so much its hard to think what to put on here.

we went into the jipsee community most day visited two ophaniges and did crafts till they where coming out of my ears its all good.

had such an amazing time and everyone was really pleased with the work that i did out there.

the team there are wounderful

and had a really fun time in the evenings pillow fights ect as well as getting young people to bed. quite funny really most nights as soon as our heads hit the pillows we where asleep. its hard work this missionary lark

getting ready to go to albainia

i think the service went well on sunday although i was alittle harrised during it and before it i didn't leave enough time to prepare it seems. but then never mind you live and learn.

i am getting ready today which is intresting making lists all the things i need too take all the things i need to leave behind so that other things want suffer there is lots todo but we will be okay i am so looking forward to it.