park

had a lovley day today. it didn't start well because i work up with a migrain but it was the type of headake that would shift with syndole and a bit of exersize. i had a great desire to get out of the city as was not in a fit state to deal with crouds which i don't think Gordon picked up on when we went clouthes shopping for what felt like hours i could have cryed.
but as soon as we got away from the center started to feel better and when we got to the park we had a amazing time playing golf i beat him yay which was a suprise and bowls then we walked miles in the wrong direction but it was lovley couse we just chatted about random stuff like boyfriends and girlfriends should do sometimes.
am now home and feeling lonely.

sunday

lead pathfinders this morning was not the best but was not the worst i have ever done so thats okay. went to the patons for tea which was lovley then we had an amazing worship service. and an okayish YF session.

we raised £177.03 for ecrad yesterday pluse some coppers that i recived tonight but havn't counted yet.

pleasantly suprised

just got back from the Gym and have been plesantly suprised by how fit i am so did the half hour induction which was pritty easy stuff and then spent another half an hour doing some more intence caredo stuff and coped then walked most of the way home which is about 3 miles are you impressed you should be.

information bord about ecrad and a donation pot the young people put this together doesn't it look great

the notice bord i made to advertise the youth work in the church

the boiled eggs from the eggs and toast event

ecrad coffee morning

Eggs and Toast. i arrived at the church this morning at 9 and proceded to start setting up for the coffee morning we were decorating eggs incoriging people to take collection pots to work and Three young people came help at the start Steve Graham and Margo then Andy came in for a bit and Heather arrived neara to the end there was a good atmopher although came very close to having an arugment with a lady about her resions for not giving money to charity. the egg painting was a great sucsess although no one wrote any letters.
At the end we discovered that we had raised over £130 which is really really cool we thought we wouldn't get much more the £60. took ages to clean up but thats life going to the gym in half an hour what fun.

getting there

it has been totaly mad today although did a daft thing this morning went into town with out the video camera for gordon and so i had to come all the way back to get it. durrrrrr.
we went out for lunch which was also a mistake but a very enjoyable and nice one we went to the new italian buffet which was lovley and were Gordon is thinking of having his graduation meal.
then ran home and started printing photos and writting captions for this notic bord that i was making for the Yfriday gig tonight.
bought a laminator this morning so that it would all take less time which is did yay. then i went to church and put it all together and joined in with the stewarding jobs. which was fun the arm bands kept falling off so mine ended up around my head. Yfriday were great as always which is the case although that was the only bit of the concert i got to get in in but that is the price we pay and i was close enough to hear the rest. :) now am printing out stuff for the morning.

well have spent the day running about which has been okay but tiring and i am very tired now.
but everything is starting to come together so thats good.
spent an hour with Gordon then went a joined the gym as i am reduclously unfit and need to sort that out.
then goven hill and i did circus skills which was fun.

walking in the rain

so have spent the day doing things for saturday my head still hurts from yesterday but oh well there is not much i can do about that. have a load of eggs to empty of their yokes so that we can use them on saturday as well.
also started making a blankate.
goven hill was quite tonight we only have four kids most of them stayed through in the computer sweet that has just opened. it was funny as they had cleared all the eqipment into the church a locked it and we didn't have a key so there was basicaly nothing other than a ball twister and jenga for the young people to interact with. although i had some good convosations with the young people and have started building some okay relationships with them.
it has been raining all day and got soaked on the way there and on the way back.

ouch

everything hurts my arms my legs and most of all and most cripling of all my head yes i have a mirgrain. and the frustrating thing is that there is no real reasion for me to have a migrain at the mo. and the big problem is i have alot of work to do over the next few days that cannot be put off for this so the desire to just sleep has to be crushed untill monday.
oh i have no idea why my arms and legs hurts iver very strange

and so it goes on

i am honistley the most dippy person alive i must be. we ment to be going to the prision this morning with the rest of my class to see how things work there but got my weeks confused and thought it was next week some how. so did not have my passport this morning. and of course my drivers licence was stollen a few weeks ago.
oh well i have some time to read for class now which is good.

child protection

pathfinders went well this morning we had treats and learned about the church of ephisus. the guys seems to really enjoy it so am quite pleased with myself.
had child protection training this afternoon and was quite sad about it, it didn't really cover the things it needed to cover like the processes of dealing with a child who was disclosing some sort of abuse i could have screemed and almost got up and added to it but i just felt like i would have been shouted down.
got yf now quite looking forward to it when it ends will have a nice long bath and get straite into bed i think which will if i am honist be the highlight of my day.

Your Dominant Thinking Style:

Exploring You thrive on the unknown and unpredictable. Novelty is your middle name. You are a challenger. You tend to challenge common assumptions and beliefs. An expert inventor and problem solver, you approach everything from new angles. You show people how to question their models of the world.

Your Secondary Thinking Style:

Visioning You are very insightful and tend to make decisions based on your insights. You focus on how things should be - even if you haven't worked out the details. An idealist, thinking of the future helps you guide your path. You tend to give others long-term direction and momentum.

What's Your Thinking Style?

Uphall and Broxburn

had a nice day yesterday although got very tired and dizzy by the end of it.
had a meeting with bill in the morning but we didn't really have anything to talk about and so it was very short.
then went to have a look around broxburn and uphall with Gordon (thats were he is going to work next year) it was a place a council estate tacked onto a villege it was very gray and sorta run down.
then we went to TGI Fridays for dinner which was very nice.
the only problem with the day was that Gordon was tired from being out all night the night before and so he was not in the best of moods. and i got tired very quickly as i have not been well.
ended up with me feeling very insecure and staying longer than i should have when we were so tired.

romeo and juliet

Jul: Wilt thou be gone? it is not yet near day. it was the nightingale, not the lark that piece'd the fearful hollow of thine ear; nightly she sings on yound pomegranate tree. believe me, me my love it was the nightingale
Rom: it was the lark, the herald of the morn, no nightingale.
she wants him to stay, so they can make love one more time; he fears for his life, he wants to go. Finally she convinces him; and now he wants to stay, and she longer wants him to stay

Augusto Boal has a very good point with this passage of Shakspear the sensible thing is not always the thing i want but i will always come round to it in the end suddenly don't hate juliet as much as i did when i was 13 might even stoop to seeing my least favourte tudor play ever again. although any play would do at the mo am hungry for the theater. this quote is from a chapture on the counter will the ideas that are in our head that stop us from going after the thing we want without thoughts for other people and so forth. It is all fasinating although i do not think i have exsplained it that well.

sleep

trobled sleep what fun couldn't get to sleep for hours had one of these stupid nights when my mind just wouldn't turn off urg. ended up drinking hot choclate infrount of the last episode of west wing on the disc.

The Keys to Your Heart

You are attracted to those who are unbridled, untrammeled, and free.

In love, you feel the most alive when things are straight-forward, and you're told that you're loved.

You'd like to your lover to think you are stylish and alluring.

You would be forced to break up with someone who was emotional, moody, and difficult to please.

Your ideal relationship is lasting. You want a relationship that looks to the future... one you can grow with.

Your risk of cheating is zero. You care about society and morality. You would never break a commitment.

You think of marriage as something precious. You'll treasure marriage and treat it as sacred.

In this moment, you think of love as something you can get or discard anytime. You're feeling self centered.

What Are The Keys To Your Heart?

You Are 25 Years Old

25 Under 12: You are a kid at heart. You still have an optimistic life view - and you look at the world with awe. 13-19: You are a teenager at heart. You question authority and are still trying to find your place in this world. 20-29: You are a twentysomething at heart. You feel excited about what's to come... love, work, and new experiences. 30-39: You are a thirtysomething at heart. You've had a taste of success and true love, but you want more! 40+: You are a mature adult. You've been through most of the ups and downs of life already. Now you get to sit back and relax.

What Age Do You Act?

victory

I wounder why it is that i have an inability to give my problems up to anyone.
I complain alot i relise that but the problems i talk about are usaly the least important onse. i find it so hard to tell people when they hurt me or when i am hurting. i find it hard to tell God which is the real problem. and when i do tell God i find it so hard to let the problems go and let him help me with them as much as i know he can.
the fundermental problem i think is that i am prod of the fact that i deal with things on my own and get embarrsed when i do need help. i feel that i am somehow not worth anything if i relinquish control of these things totaly. if i do not do things on my own without help then somehow when i am victoriesous over those thing it is not my victory and i need victory.